Recently I was at a local Albuquerque trampoline park, a non-dangerous activity, where two parents we're discussing how the other parents of their children were not spending more time with the children. I was not eavesdropping because this was in a public space but this conversation went on and I couldn't stop listening. Then, one of the parents (Parent A) received a phone call from the other parent (Parent B) of one of the children, and as the conversation went on it devolved from there. The side of the conversation I could hear, and I presume, was that the parents were explaining to each other their rights on why it was okay or not okay to be at the trampoline park with the child without Parent B's consent. Parent A kept saying I don't have to tell you when I go the trampoline park. I didn't hear the other side other conversation but I am confident Parent B was saying that you have to get my consent before the child goes to the trampoline park. Around 30 minutes after the parents hung up on the phone the Parent B showed up at the trampoline park. Again, Parent B demanded the child leave the trampoline park because Parent A had no right to have the child at the trampoline park without permission. This conversation went back and forth where Parent A defended the right to have the child at the trampoline park and Parent B defended the child’s removal from the park. Parent B was concerned Parent A had to sign a waiver with the trampoline park and for this reason for Parent A needed to get permission from Parent B. The yelling went back and forth in public. Now, fortunately, the child was not near the parents and was having fun at the park, but security got involved and ultimately Parent B was asked to leave the premises because of the scene that was being created by both of them.
I am not saying that either parent was wrong in this situation. There is a time and place the parents can and should address these concerns. If there are concerns about certain activities that your children should or should not be involved in you should address them in a written agreement that will become an order of the Court. In any written agreement you enter into you should look at those agreements from the perspective of your child and what is in their best interest. I am optimistic that these parents will at some point, reach reasonable agreements related to their children's activities. When considering major activities for children, for example, extracurricular activities like playing a sport or taking on a hobby (like playing an instrument), parents should have equal say before that child participates in that activity. For non-dangerous activities like bowling, attending a birthday party or volunteering at a food bank does not require the other parent’s permission or be notified and is a ridiculous position to take if a parent believes that their consent is required. An example of a dangerous activity would include skydiving where specialized equipment and instruction is required before participating in the activity.
If you need additional information about your Albuquerque Custody case and when consent is required for extracurricular activities or non-routine extracurricular activities and how it affects your children's lives and their best interest contact us at 1 800 DIVORCE.